Dear Senator Santorum:

For Catholic Online, regarding the sexual abuse scandals plaguing the Catholic Church, you wrote:

“When the culture is sick, every element in it becomes infected. While it is no excuse for this scandal, it is no surprise that Boston, a seat of academic, political and cultural liberalism in America, lies at the center of the storm.”

Thank you for pointing out the obvious tie between the abuse of innocents by the catholic clergy, and the liberalism rampant in the United States. The connection is clear.

There is another connection, however, which I believe you should investigate. A little known subversive group is even more closely tied to this scandal than the liberals. After months of investigation, I have discovered the little-recognized fact that 100% of the people involved in this abuse are…. Catholic!!!!

Clearly the entire Catholic community has been brainwashed by the liberal cabal to advance their nefarious plots. Please, I beg you, bring to light the details about this little-known cult, intent on the perversion of our youth, and the destruction of american values.

I remind you, fully 100% of the people involved in this attack on traditional american values are either avowed, or secretly, catholics! This fact should alarm every true American!! Please, before it is too late, act now to bring the lurid details about this subversive cult to light, and protect us from their plans to destroy our way of life.

It makes as much sense as the rest of what you say.

Al Folsom